Today's Track : Smashing Pumpkins - Tonight, Tonight
Apparently the warehouse lady at my office thinks she runs the show in here. I called UPS to come pick-up some crap that had to be returned to Dell and she freaked on me cuz apparently we don't use UPS. Then I told her that Dell had prepaid the UPS shipment and she then got mad at me for not letting her know ahead of time. What on earth was I thinking? I should have ran everything by her insignificant self...
Stupid warehouse lady, little does she know after work I'm going to piss in her gas tank. When I'm done that I'm going to hop on her car hood and take a big shit on her windshield. Then I'm going to break into her car and turn on the windshield wipers. She's lucky I'm in a good mood because it's the labour day weekend.
Friday, August 29, 2003
Friday, August 22, 2003
Today's Track : Bob Marley - Buffalo Soldier
So there I was playing texas holdem at the Casino and for a brief moment and the first time it's happened to me, I got flustered at the table. Here's a little background info about holdem before I get into the story. In holdem there's two ante's or blinds as they call it. One is a small blind and one is a big blind. The big bind is whatever the starting bet is. The small blind is half the starting bet. In order to continue playing, you have to match the bet of the big blind (in poker lingo "calling" a bet). So I'm sitting there playing with 9 other people and this fat lady decides to sit down at our table to my right. As the dealer is moving the marker (determines who's the dealer and who's blind) to the next position, this fat lady turns to me and says, "Am I Blind?" Without thinking I turned to her and said, "Yes, you're big." For a brief moment I was quite embarrassed for the lady and myself. I swear the rest of the table was about to lose their poker faces as well. At least I didn't make the situation worse by correcting myself.
fat lady - "Am I blind?"
shaky - "Yes, you're big."
fat lady - "What did you just say?"
shaky - "You're big boned...I mean big blind!"
table - *looks at shaky*...*silence*
shaky - *looks at his pair of aces* "umm...I fold."
Needless to say the night didn't start off well and 8 hrs later I was in the red about $60.
So there I was playing texas holdem at the Casino and for a brief moment and the first time it's happened to me, I got flustered at the table. Here's a little background info about holdem before I get into the story. In holdem there's two ante's or blinds as they call it. One is a small blind and one is a big blind. The big bind is whatever the starting bet is. The small blind is half the starting bet. In order to continue playing, you have to match the bet of the big blind (in poker lingo "calling" a bet). So I'm sitting there playing with 9 other people and this fat lady decides to sit down at our table to my right. As the dealer is moving the marker (determines who's the dealer and who's blind) to the next position, this fat lady turns to me and says, "Am I Blind?" Without thinking I turned to her and said, "Yes, you're big." For a brief moment I was quite embarrassed for the lady and myself. I swear the rest of the table was about to lose their poker faces as well. At least I didn't make the situation worse by correcting myself.
fat lady - "Am I blind?"
shaky - "Yes, you're big."
fat lady - "What did you just say?"
shaky - "You're big boned...I mean big blind!"
table - *looks at shaky*...*silence*
shaky - *looks at his pair of aces* "umm...I fold."
Needless to say the night didn't start off well and 8 hrs later I was in the red about $60.
Wednesday, August 13, 2003
today's track : Billy Idol - White Wedding
So there's a big virus going around and I think I've got it on my computer at home. Figures. Luckily for me I was planning on reformatting my computer anyhow. This big virus also has me running around the office here and making sure that everyone has installed the right patches and updated their anti-virus software. Damn viruses are wasting my time!! I gotta get myself disconnected from the matrix soon.
This week I've gone on a shopping spree of sorts. On Monday I purchased a brand new poker chip set on ebay. Yesterday I bought new glasses. I'm now a not-so-proud owner of Dolce and Gabana glasses. I have a cousin in Philadelphia that wears nothing but name brand designer clothes. His closet is full of Versace, Gucci, Louis Vouton, Guess, and of course Dolce & Gabana. Some of his belts cost more than my entire wardrobe. Personally I find him to be rather shallow and materialistic and I've always associated these name brands with those types of people. Yesterday when I bought glasses however, I couldn't find a single pair of quality glasses that actually looked decent on me. So now I'm wearing one of the products I absolutely despise. Woe is me. I guess the only good thing about getting these glasses was that I was able to get them pretty much for nothing since my mom knows the owners of the glass shop and my benefits at work cover most of it.
I'm feeling rather crappy today. If I was one of the seven dwarfs I'd either be Sleepy or Grumpy today. I go through a myriad of dwarf like symptoms each week: Sleepy; Grumpy; Dopey; Doc; Sneezy; Happy; and of course not-so-Bashful aka Slutty. When the end of the week comes I'll be Happy. I'm headed up north again this weekend for another camp trip. More fun in the sun. I'll be sure to put on plenty of sunscreen this weekend since I'm starting to look a little Cambodian-like. Not that there's anything wrong with being Cambodian. I just hate being mistaken for something I'm not. Yesterday I was mistaken for some ridiculously good looking male supermodel while walking down Dundas. I hate when that happens.
If anyone is an avid reader and is a fan of Douglas Coupland. He's got a new book out called "Hey, Nostradamus". I've read the opening chapter and some previews on it and it sounds to be similar in style to his book "Girlfriend in a Coma", which was an excellent book. Go out and pick up that book!!
For those of you who like looking at stars. There's a meteor shower happening tonight! Since it coincides with the full moon, the best time to view it is just before sunrise when the moon starts to disappear. Here's your chance at making tons of wishes.
Well it's almost lunch time...I think I'll be grabbing some grub soon. So long and keep on rocking the free world!
So there's a big virus going around and I think I've got it on my computer at home. Figures. Luckily for me I was planning on reformatting my computer anyhow. This big virus also has me running around the office here and making sure that everyone has installed the right patches and updated their anti-virus software. Damn viruses are wasting my time!! I gotta get myself disconnected from the matrix soon.
This week I've gone on a shopping spree of sorts. On Monday I purchased a brand new poker chip set on ebay. Yesterday I bought new glasses. I'm now a not-so-proud owner of Dolce and Gabana glasses. I have a cousin in Philadelphia that wears nothing but name brand designer clothes. His closet is full of Versace, Gucci, Louis Vouton, Guess, and of course Dolce & Gabana. Some of his belts cost more than my entire wardrobe. Personally I find him to be rather shallow and materialistic and I've always associated these name brands with those types of people. Yesterday when I bought glasses however, I couldn't find a single pair of quality glasses that actually looked decent on me. So now I'm wearing one of the products I absolutely despise. Woe is me. I guess the only good thing about getting these glasses was that I was able to get them pretty much for nothing since my mom knows the owners of the glass shop and my benefits at work cover most of it.
I'm feeling rather crappy today. If I was one of the seven dwarfs I'd either be Sleepy or Grumpy today. I go through a myriad of dwarf like symptoms each week: Sleepy; Grumpy; Dopey; Doc; Sneezy; Happy; and of course not-so-Bashful aka Slutty. When the end of the week comes I'll be Happy. I'm headed up north again this weekend for another camp trip. More fun in the sun. I'll be sure to put on plenty of sunscreen this weekend since I'm starting to look a little Cambodian-like. Not that there's anything wrong with being Cambodian. I just hate being mistaken for something I'm not. Yesterday I was mistaken for some ridiculously good looking male supermodel while walking down Dundas. I hate when that happens.
If anyone is an avid reader and is a fan of Douglas Coupland. He's got a new book out called "Hey, Nostradamus". I've read the opening chapter and some previews on it and it sounds to be similar in style to his book "Girlfriend in a Coma", which was an excellent book. Go out and pick up that book!!
For those of you who like looking at stars. There's a meteor shower happening tonight! Since it coincides with the full moon, the best time to view it is just before sunrise when the moon starts to disappear. Here's your chance at making tons of wishes.
Well it's almost lunch time...I think I'll be grabbing some grub soon. So long and keep on rocking the free world!
Thursday, August 07, 2003
Last night just before nodding off...
SS - How are you?
Shaky - What did you just say?
SS - I said, "How are you?"
Shaky - Oh...I thought you said "I have to poo." I'm fine by the way. And if you've got to poo then you know where the bathroom is. Just don't mention it again.
SS - Mention what?
Shaky - The part about you pooing. You'll ruin my utopia.
SS - Huh? What utopia?
Shaky - Girls don't poo or fart in my utopic world.
SS - What? We don't poo or fart?
Shaky - You're doing it...
SS - Doing what???
Shaky - Ruining my utopia.
SS - Seriously, you don't think we poo or fart??
Shaky - Let us never speak of this again.
SS - What?...wait a minute. We have to talk!
Shaky - Good night!
SS - I hope you know I'm bringing this up again tomorrow.
Shaky - I don't know what you're talking about. Good night.
SS - You need counselling. Good night.
SS - How are you?
Shaky - What did you just say?
SS - I said, "How are you?"
Shaky - Oh...I thought you said "I have to poo." I'm fine by the way. And if you've got to poo then you know where the bathroom is. Just don't mention it again.
SS - Mention what?
Shaky - The part about you pooing. You'll ruin my utopia.
SS - Huh? What utopia?
Shaky - Girls don't poo or fart in my utopic world.
SS - What? We don't poo or fart?
Shaky - You're doing it...
SS - Doing what???
Shaky - Ruining my utopia.
SS - Seriously, you don't think we poo or fart??
Shaky - Let us never speak of this again.
SS - What?...wait a minute. We have to talk!
Shaky - Good night!
SS - I hope you know I'm bringing this up again tomorrow.
Shaky - I don't know what you're talking about. Good night.
SS - You need counselling. Good night.
today's new track : The Carpenters - Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down
I'm in a miserable non-talkative place today.
And for all you people with the thousands of pictures of yourself on your webpage. Stop fooling yourself by telling me you're insecure! You're NOT. You're just looking for reassurance that it's ok to be that arrogant and self-centered. And if you want that sort of reassurance -- here it is. You're fuckin beautiful...............at least on the outside.
Wow. I feel much better now.
I'm in a miserable non-talkative place today.
And for all you people with the thousands of pictures of yourself on your webpage. Stop fooling yourself by telling me you're insecure! You're NOT. You're just looking for reassurance that it's ok to be that arrogant and self-centered. And if you want that sort of reassurance -- here it is. You're fuckin beautiful...............at least on the outside.
Wow. I feel much better now.
Wednesday, August 06, 2003
today's track : Ayla - Angelfalls
Someone once told me to never jump from a burning building into a sinking sink. I don't know what the heck he was talking about. In fact I don't know what he was smoking or else I might have asked him for some. If you're ever in a burning building and you see a sinking sink, their must be water below or possibly quick sand. Either one is better than burning to death so jump. Whenever you find yourself in a dire situation -- fight; run; hide; jump. The name of the game is survival. Endure as much bullshit as you can and then make a decision whether or not you're going to fight for your existence or whether you're going down with the ship. There is a love that's inherently given; love for yourself. Sometimes that love is selfish but sometimes it has to be. It's refreshing to see the beauty in yourself and knowing that it's worth saving. For that moment -- everyone else can go fuck themselves. Live your life for yourself and no one else.
Someone once told me to never jump from a burning building into a sinking sink. I don't know what the heck he was talking about. In fact I don't know what he was smoking or else I might have asked him for some. If you're ever in a burning building and you see a sinking sink, their must be water below or possibly quick sand. Either one is better than burning to death so jump. Whenever you find yourself in a dire situation -- fight; run; hide; jump. The name of the game is survival. Endure as much bullshit as you can and then make a decision whether or not you're going to fight for your existence or whether you're going down with the ship. There is a love that's inherently given; love for yourself. Sometimes that love is selfish but sometimes it has to be. It's refreshing to see the beauty in yourself and knowing that it's worth saving. For that moment -- everyone else can go fuck themselves. Live your life for yourself and no one else.
Friday, August 01, 2003
today's track : Darude - Music
A quiet afternoon in the office today. I'm just sitting around and writing error-handling code for this database application I've been working on. Not exactly the most fun thing in the world but then again it's not exactly taxing on the brain. Just trying to test and figure out all the major errors that can occur when a user uses this application and then spit back a message to them informing them of the error then handling the error appropriately. Here's a list of some of my error messages...
"Dumbass, don't you follow instructions?"
"Did you really think you'd get away with that, you obviously underestimate me."
"You just broke this program and now I will have to break your will."
"I swear to god if I had hands I'd bitch slap you."
Two more hours to go before I head off for the long weekend. It looks like it's going to rain all weekend in Ontario. Quite miserable but I'll be at a cottage under a roof so it shouldn't be so bad. Hopefully I'll get to try out my new fishing gear. I spent about $200 on new fishing gear and I'm starting to feel a bit guilty about it. I better catch a big fish this weekend to justify the splurging. I've got a few sales tactics to try and get these fishies in the boat this weekend.
"Here fishy fishy, I think you should get in this boat!...I've got a big juicy can of worms for you!...Everyone who's anyone is up in here!...That fish named Wanda is my friend!"
If this fails I could probably go back to the hook, line, and sinker tactic.
I just contacted my dealer about getting some weed for the weekend...HAHAHA...my dealer...I like how that sounds. I've never smoked weed before but friend Stanathan was going to give me a joint to try. Too bad he's not going to be home before I leave for the cottage tonight. I guess I'll have to wait another weekend before I get high.
Have a great weekend everyone!
A quiet afternoon in the office today. I'm just sitting around and writing error-handling code for this database application I've been working on. Not exactly the most fun thing in the world but then again it's not exactly taxing on the brain. Just trying to test and figure out all the major errors that can occur when a user uses this application and then spit back a message to them informing them of the error then handling the error appropriately. Here's a list of some of my error messages...
"Dumbass, don't you follow instructions?"
"Did you really think you'd get away with that, you obviously underestimate me."
"You just broke this program and now I will have to break your will."
"I swear to god if I had hands I'd bitch slap you."
Two more hours to go before I head off for the long weekend. It looks like it's going to rain all weekend in Ontario. Quite miserable but I'll be at a cottage under a roof so it shouldn't be so bad. Hopefully I'll get to try out my new fishing gear. I spent about $200 on new fishing gear and I'm starting to feel a bit guilty about it. I better catch a big fish this weekend to justify the splurging. I've got a few sales tactics to try and get these fishies in the boat this weekend.
"Here fishy fishy, I think you should get in this boat!...I've got a big juicy can of worms for you!...Everyone who's anyone is up in here!...That fish named Wanda is my friend!"
If this fails I could probably go back to the hook, line, and sinker tactic.
I just contacted my dealer about getting some weed for the weekend...HAHAHA...my dealer...I like how that sounds. I've never smoked weed before but friend Stanathan was going to give me a joint to try. Too bad he's not going to be home before I leave for the cottage tonight. I guess I'll have to wait another weekend before I get high.
Have a great weekend everyone!
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